How to Break Bad Habits

How to Break Bad Habits | The Ultimate Guide for 2023

Written by Harry Bird

Easily Learn How to Break Bad Habits

If your anything like me then you've had your fair share of bad habits. I've been through the mill myself, having once been hooked on everything from sugar to nicotine among other things.

It's this fact alone that drives me to want to help others to escape their own habits. We're living in an age where bad habits are the norm. So how do we break bad habits?

We all have habits that we wish we could change, whether it's procrastination, overeating, or biting our nails.

But breaking a habit can be tough, especially if we've been doing it for a long time. In this guide, we'll walk you through the steps you can take to break your bad habits once and for all.

You'll learn about the psychological factors that keep us stuck in our bad habits, as well as strategies and techniques you can use to break free. By the end of this guide, you'll have all the tools you need to make lasting change in your life, plus you'll have a firm grasp on how to stop a bad habit permanently. So let's get started!

You can also read: How Long Does It Take To Break A Habit

How You Develop Habits 

An illustration showing  you how developing good habits can help you have a good life

If you've ever found yourself struggling to break a bad habit, you're not alone. Many of us have habits that we'd like to change, but for some reason, they seem to stick around no matter how hard we try to shake them. Why is that?

One theory that has gained a lot of traction in recent years is the three R's: reminder, routine, and reward. This theory suggests that habits are formed through a cycle of trigger, behavior, and reward.

Here's how it works: a trigger (like a specific feeling or sound) reminds us to engage in a certain behavior, which becomes a routine as we repeat it over time. Finally, we receive a reward (which doesn't have to be physical) for completing the behavior, which helps to reinforce the habit.

One common reward associated with habits is the release of dopamine in the brain, which makes us feel good. This is why habits can be so difficult to break - we continue to engage in them because they provide some sort of benefit, whether it's physical or just a mental boost.

So, if you're trying to break a bad habit, it's important to understand the three R's and how they contribute to the habit's persistence. With this knowledge, you'll be better equipped to break the cycle and create lasting change in your life.

Let's take a closer look at the habit forming cycle:

  • Habits are formed through repetition. The more we repeat a behavior, the more automatic it becomes.
  • Habits can be formed in as little as 21 days.
  • Our brains are more susceptible to forming habits when we are in a state of autopilot, like when we're tired or stressed.
  • Habits can be influenced by our environment. For example, if we always eat a certain snack while watching TV, the TV becomes a trigger for the behavior.
  • Some habits are easier to form than others. Physical habits (like tying your shoes) are generally easier to form than mental habits (like meditation).

Remember, breaking a habit is a process and it takes time. Don't get discouraged if you don't see results right away. With a little bit of self-awareness and effort, you can break those bad habits and create positive change in your life.

Tips to Break Bad Habits 

Man posing with a cigarette symbolising quitting a bad habit

Start by Identifying Your Triggers 

If you understood the theory of the three R's correctly, by now, you'll know that triggers are behind all habits. Thus, you should start by determining which ones are supporting the habit you want to break.

Some questions you can ask yourself are:

  • Where does that behavior occur?
  • When does it happen? Is it at a specific time of the day?
  • How do you feel after you do it?
  • Are there more people involved in your habit?
  • Does it occur after something else?

One of the most important steps in habit-breaking is identifying your triggers and removing them. When you do that, you remove the source of the bad habit and help stop the behavior from happening, which is vital to achieving the results you want. 

Figuring out why you want to change should be the main focus when looking to break a bad habit as this will be the main motivating factor that is going to keep you on track.

So, Why Do You Want to Change?

Not everyone wants to change their bad habits. If you want to change, there must be a good reason behind it that will keep you motivated along the way . Otherwise, you might drop your efforts and go back to the way you were, which might make you feel even worse in the long run.

Take some time and write down a list of reasons why breaking the habit would be good for you. You should make sure you’re able to visualize what you wrote, so you could keep your list in a place you regularly see, such as your mirror, your phone wallpaper, or your fridge.

Here's an example list of habits that you can use to help you get started:

  • Procrastination: I have a tendency to put things off until the last minute, which causes unnecessary stress and often leads to subpar work. I want to break this habit and start being more proactive in managing my time.
  • Overeating: I have a tendency to eat more than I should, especially when I'm feeling stressed or emotional. I want to break this habit and learn to be more mindful of my portion sizes and make healthier choices.
  • Negative self-talk: I often catch myself being overly critical of myself and engaging in negative self-talk. I want to break this habit and learn to be more compassionate and kind to myself.
  • Social media addiction: I find myself scrolling through social media for hours on end, which takes away from time I could be spending on more productive activities. I want to break this habit and learn to use social media in a more mindful and intentional way.

Find Support to Help You Kick the Habit

If you're looking to break a bad habit, it's completely normal to feel like you need some support. In fact, asking for help doesn't mean you're unable to do it on your own - it just means that you're committed to making a change and you want someone to help you along the way.

There are many different places you can go to get support for your habit-breaking journey. For example, you could:

  • Talk to friends and family members about your plans. It's possible that some of the people in your life are also looking to break the same habit, which could be a great opportunity for you to support each other.
  • Join a support group. Specifically for people trying to break the same habit. These groups can provide a sense of community and a safe space to share your struggles and successes.
  • Consider working with a therapist or counselor who has experience helping people break bad habits. They can provide you with personalized support and guidance to help you reach your goals.
  • Seek out online resources, such as forums or social media groups, where you can connect with others who are working to break similar habits.

Remember, breaking a bad habit is never easy, but it is possible. With the right support and resources, you can overcome any type of bad habit and achieve your goals.

A support group talking about giving up bad habits

Below Ive listed several community support groups and therapist companys that can help you get on the right track.

Community support groups:

Talk therapy:

Self Help Social networks:

Mindfulness Can Help

Even though not everyone is used to practicing mindfulness, it could be immensely helpful if you want to break nasty habits. 

Mindfulness can help you be aware of the present moment, along with your feelings, thoughts, and physical sensations. As you understand your own triggers and how they make you feel, you might be able to improve, which is why being mindful is so important. It helps you focus on yourself.

Here's a short mindfulness meditation you can do to get you started. I've shared this one a lot as it's the same video I used to watch years ago when I was going through the motions. Enjoy!

Replace the Habit

When we try to simply stop doing something that has become a habitual behavior, it can be difficult to resist the urge to engage in that behavior. By replacing a bad habit with a positive one, we can train our brains to associate a specific trigger or cue with a new, healthy behavior.

For example, if you want to stop eating so much candy, you might keep healthy snacks like yogurt or dried fruit within easy reach. When you feel the urge to snack on candy, you can choose the healthier option instead. This not only helps you cut back on sugary treats, but it also helps you establish a new, healthier habit.

Here are a few more examples of positive habits you can use to replace bad ones:

  • Instead of smoking, try chewing gum or going for a walk when you feel the urge to smoke.
  • Instead of procrastinating, try setting a timer for 25 minutes and working on a task without distractions. When the timer goes off, take a 5 minute break and repeat. This technique is called the Pomodoro Technique and can help you build momentum and stay focused.
  • Instead of skipping exercise, try starting your day with a quick morning workout or taking a walk during your lunch break.
  • Instead of mindlessly scrolling through social media, try setting aside specific times of the day to check your feeds and limit your overall screen time.

Remember, the key is to find a positive habit that you can easily integrate into your routine and that feels rewarding and satisfying. With time and practice, these positive habits can become just as ingrained as the bad habits you are trying to break.

Related: Top 10 Best Books on Habits and How to Change Them

Leave Yourself Reminders

Leaving reminders on post it notes can help you break a bad habit

Adopting new habits and breaking old ones can be challenging. One of the things that Ive found to be particulary helpful is setting reminders. 

These reminders can take various forms, such as alarms on your phone or computer with motivating phrases, sticky notes placed in strategic locations, or any other method that helps you to recall the reason behind your desire to break a particular habit.

Here's a short list of reminder examples you can use to get started:

  • Set a reminder on your phone or computer to go off at the times when you are most likely to engage in the bad habit.
  • Place a sticky note with a reminder on your bathroom mirror, fridge, or other places you frequent.
  • Use a bracelet or rubber band as a physical reminder. Every time you notice the bracelet or rubber band, it can serve as a reminder to resist the urge to engage in the bad habit.
  • Share your goals with a friend or accountability partner and ask them to remind you when they notice you engaging in the bad habit.
  • Keep a journal and write down each time you catch yourself engaging in the bad habit. This can help you identify patterns and triggers, and come up with strategies for avoiding those triggers in the future.
  • Use a habit tracking app to log your progress and get reminders throughout the day.
  • Consider enlisting the help of a professional counselor or coach who can provide guidance and support as you work to break your bad habits.

It might seem too good to be true but here me out, the use of reminders can serve as a helpful reminder of your goals and provide the motivation you need to stay on track and make lasting changes - In fact along with support groups this is one of the strategies I used personally to stop drinking alcohol for over 7 years.

Prepare to Fail

It may sound harsh, but when you’re breaking a habit, you’re bound to have slip-ups. It’s part of the process, and you should never feel discouraged about it since it happens to everyone.

When you have a slip-up, try to do breathing exercises, unwind, or remind yourself that it’s okay to fail sometimes. It doesn’t mean all hope is lost. You can still break the habit – you just need to get back on track.

Don’t Give Up

Therapist

Having slip-ups often causes many people to drop their efforts completely because they believe one tiny error means they can’t do it. Instead of thinking like that, try to focus on your qualities, and remember all the progress you’ve made.

Regardless of what you chose today, tomorrow is a new day and you can always pick something different. At the same time, your slip-up doesn’t erase everything you did right. You should keep going and leave that all-or-nothing mindset behind.

Don’t Overwhelm Yourself

Trying to break multiple habits at once can be overwhelming and exhausting. It's important to remember that habits are ingrained behaviors that take time and effort to change. By focusing on one specific habit, you can give yourself the time and energy needed to make lasting changes.

Starting with small, simple changes can be a great way to build momentum and motivation. When you are able to see progress and feel a sense of accomplishment, it can be easier to stay motivated and keep going.

It's important to be patient and kind to yourself as you work on breaking your bad habits. Change takes time, and it's normal to experience setbacks or slip ups along the way.

By focusing on small, achievable goals and celebrating your progress, you can build the confidence and motivation needed to keep going and ultimately break your bad habits for good.

Change Your Surroundings

It's true that our environment plays a significant role in our habits and behaviors. When we are surrounded by things that trigger us to engage in unhealthy or negative habits, it can be more difficult to resist the temptation.

On the other hand, when we are in an environment that supports our goals and values, it can be easier to cultivate positive habits.

Making small changes to your environment can be an effective way to support your habit breaking efforts. For example, if you are trying to stop snacking on unhealthy foods, you might clear your pantry of tempting treats and keep healthy snacks within easy reach instead.

If you are trying to stop procrastinating, you might create a dedicated workspace with minimal distractions.

It's also important to consider the people in your environment and how they may be impacting your habits. Surrounding yourself with people who are supportive of your goals and who embody the healthy mindset you are trying to achieve can be a powerful motivator.

 On the other hand, if you have people in your life who are not supportive of your goals or who engage in habits that undermine your efforts, it might be necessary to distance yourself from them, at least temporarily, while you work on breaking your bad habits.

Visualize Your Future Self

Visualization can be a powerful tool to help you break a bad habit

Imagining yourself in the future and visualizing the person you want to be can be a powerful tool for breaking bad habits. When we focus on the negative aspects of ourselves, it can be easy to feel discouraged and believe that change is not possible. However, by shifting our focus to the future and visualizing ourselves as the person we want to be, we can tap into a sense of hope and possibility.

Visualization is a technique that involves using your imagination to picture a desired outcome or scenario in your mind. When you visualize yourself doing something that brings you calm and relaxation, such as breathing, writing, playing, or singing, you can train your brain to associate those activities with a sense of calm and clarity.

This can be especially useful when you find yourself in a situation where you are tempted to engage in a bad habit. By practicing visualization, you can build the mental muscles needed to make healthy choices in the moment.

Remember, visualization is just one tool among many that can help you break bad habits and cultivate positive ones. It's important to also work on building new habits, finding healthy alternatives to your bad habits, and seeking support from others as you work towards your goals.

So How Do You Break a Bad Habit?

While breaking bad habits can be a difficult and challenging process, it is important to remember that with dedication and perseverance, it is possible to overcome them. However, the rewards of breaking bad habits can be well worth the effort.

By breaking negative habits, we can improve our physical and mental health, build stronger relationships, and lead more fulfilling lives.

So how do you break a bad habit? Here's a few key tips to keep in mind:

  • Stay motivated and keep working towards your goals. It's easy to get discouraged when things get tough, but it's important to remember that change takes time and effort. Don't give up when you encounter setbacks or challenges. Instead, stay focused on your long-term goals and remind yourself of the benefits that breaking your bad habits will bring.
  • Talk to others. Sharing your goals and struggles with others can be a great way to get support and stay on track. Whether it's a friend, family member, or a professional counselor, having someone to talk to can help you stay motivated and accountable.
  • Use tools to help you stay on track. Sticky notes, alarms, and other reminders can be helpful in reminding you of your goals and helping you stay focused.

Remember, every small step you take towards breaking a bad habit brings you one step closer to a healthier and happier life. With dedication and perseverance, you can overcome your bad habits and create the life you want.

It's important to stay motivated and keep working towards your goals, even when things get tough.

Remember, talking to others can help you stay on track and using tools such as sticky notes and alarms can be very helpful when helping you learn how to break bad habits.

Remember, every small step you take towards breaking a bad habit brings you one step closer to a healthier and happier life.

About the Author

A Husband, father of 6 and musician, Harry decided to create BirdnSoul to share his mindful journey with the world, and help others become more mindful in their daily lives.

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